Regular Columns

So The Fifth Element was on TV today. We all knew Tricky, one of trip-hopping Bristol, England's favorite rappers/raspers, played a small role as Right Arm (!), Gary Oldman's henchman. He was well cast, because, well, Tricky just looks like he's from the future. Those hairstyles, those jawbones, those mascara-frosted eyes.

Anyway, being familiar with the film careers of various other 1990s UK electronic musicians (jungle fiend Goldie in The World Is Not Enough, for instance, where he coincidentally appears as a scary semi-futuristic henchman-type dude. Not to mention Snatch, henchman there too). Anyway, we just had to check if Tricky had been in anything else.

And oh, has he ever.

1. Start at IMDB
2. Search "Dolph Lundgren"
3. Click on "Dolph Lundgren (Actor, The Mechanik (2005))"
4. Scroll down and click on "29. Red Scorpion (1989)... Nikolai"
5. Scroll down and click on "M. Emmet Walsh... Dewey Ferguson"
6. Scroll down and click on "48. Free Willy 2: The Adventure Home (1995)... Bill Wilcox"
7. Click on Back in your browser or press the Delete/Backspace key twice
8. Look at the writing credits, and you've found your lobbyist.

Admit it, you've spent more than a few moments browsing your life away on IMDB.com. Yeah, yeah, you started trying to find out who directed Casablanca. But you ended up looking at what the spawn of Joe Piscopo is working on. And that's ok.

This feature will compile those utterly useless tidbits of information for you, so next time you're having a conversation with someone, you can say, "Did you know someone made a documentary about Stephen Tobolowsky?"

This is NOT a sad bastard mix. Oh sure, it's got some sad-bastardy material. But really it's all about the times when people are brought together by hate. It's an ode to people who hate people. Because we all do.

Side A

1. The Avalanches: "Undersea Community" (At Last Alone)
I like the way this song opens: a soft fade-in; an unagressive beat that drops quickly; a tease of the rap... and then it blows up.

Between ages 16 and 20, you could probably assume that I was a) overtly sad; b) obsessed with logic/death; c) laughing at everything. Not a lot has changed, but this mix gives some insight to how I view those days and what may or may not have been going on in my head.

1. Antipop Consortium: "Ping Pong" (Arrhythmia)
I think I introduced Ari Berman (yes, the Ari Berman) to them when I lived across the hall from him, but he'd never admit that.

2. The Exploding Hearts: "Rumours In Town" (Guitar Romantic)
More than half the band died in a bus accident in something very similar to that Simpsons Episode when Spinal Tap fell off a cliff.

This fall, I was unemployed. Granted, I had just graduated from college in June. But it didn't help that I spent the summer watching movies and drinking beer, and then went to backpack in Europe for six weeks. Though I got a job shortly after making this mix, I can still listen to it with almost the same amount of uncertainty and dread. Enjoy.

1. The Three O'Clock: "Jet Fighter" (Sixteen Tambourines)
Any song with a countdown is automatically a good kick-off for a mix. Add a sweet synth riff at the end of said countdown and you have gold.

2. Dykehouse: "Signal Crossing" (Midrange)

The perfect mix for Thanksgiving time. Broken down into discrete sections:
a) The surge of excitement during the thanksgiving meal.
b) The cozy happiness of digestion.
c) Dessert!
d) The depression that comes with realizing how much you ate.
e) The revelation that you've got days worth of leftovers to look forward to.

1. Quincy Jones: "Ironside" (Kill Bill Vol. 1)
P-U-L-S-A-T-I-N-G R-E-D

2. Foxy Brown: "Oh Yeah" (Daddy G DJ Kicks)
LAWD! LAWD! "You an industry chick/I’m and in-da-streets chick”

3. Goldfrapp: "Lovely 2 C U" (Supernature)
Best known for having the backing track for a gameboy commercial, she could probably kick our asses at Smash Brothers with all her Nintendo cred.

4. Radiohead: "Remyxamatosis [Cristian Vogel Remix]" (2+2= 5 Single)
Jamie Lidell’s batshit crazy friend does this remix, for what I can only assume is because the name is just too good to pass up. Results are pretty awesome.

5. Isolee: "My Hi Matic" (Wearemonster)

One of my dream jobs is to curate for an art cinema. Of course, it would have to be the art cinema du jour of a major city, frequented by the filmmakers whose films I program. Until then, I will use this as a forum for my series ideas. If any curators out there see something they like, contact me at jeff@cosmodromemag.com.

CINEMA NO MOSS

In the first installment of what we hope to be a regular Cosmodrome feature, Krasdale Kolumn will feature reviews of the foods and aesthetics of Brooklyn's favorite generic food empire. We start off with the most ubiquitous and favorite of their catalogue:

Name: Krasdale Macaroni & Cheese Dinner

This is the holy grail of the Krasdale Empire. No Brooklynite’s pantry is complete without at least 10 boxes squirreled away. The clutch dinner food that is perfect for that week between paychecks or grocery trips. The perfect food that is filling and not completely unsettling.

The Bermz has been busy - a full-fledged article and a blog post: "Can Justice Be Trusted?" and "Buckley Hearts Osama".

Be on the lookout for the Cosmodrome follow-up. Our crack research team is putting these posts to the test and will have a response as soon as humanly possible.